Too much learning. Not enough doing. My passion rut.

I've fallen into this crazy passion rut. I accumulate and hoard information like a frantic knowledge pack rat. My kindle app is stuffed yet I subscribe to more magazines, buy more books, and download more PDFs. My camera hasn't been touched in days but I check out Clickin Moms like its my job. I'm enrolled in Souvenir Foto School but am a week behind on my assignment. The ebook I'm writing isn't finished yet I'm working on a proposal for a nonfiction book. I could go on for days.

Why do I do this to myself? Am I the only one?

In an attempt to diagnose myself I've reached the conclusion that my compulsion stems from my lack of free time. I have little time and too much I want to do. My refusal to admit to myself that it's impossible to accomplish anything if I'm always bouncing from one interest or task to another like a ping pong ball is crippling me. Well, crippling is extreme but it is preventing me from striking out lines on my to-do list and that is annoying.

This morning I found this post in my inbox. YES! I am a craft junkie. A junkie of the crafts of writing and photography. I adore them both equally and strive to improve daily. It's finally sinking in that I will never improve if I do not devote equal time to doing as I do  learning. It's a hard habit to break. I've been this way my entire life. I'll easily devour thousands of pages of the thoughts of others on whatever topic I am passionate about at the moment. It's fascinating and much less time consuming than, you know, actually doing...something.

Motherhood might be to blame as well. It's much easier to read on my phone while the kids eat, nap, or sleep than it is to sit down at my laptop when they are awake or my eyes are glazed over from the exhaustion of a long day spent alone with toddlers. Toting a DSLR and playing soccer at the same time isn't a good idea. My kids win. My camera gets dusty. Hobbies, passion, and interests take a backseat. I am okay with this. Childhood is fleeting and such but I can make some changes.

No more:

  • new books or e-books until I finish at least five (this might kill me)
  • photography classes until I finish up the two I have in process
  • new lenses until I complete a portfolio review with an accomplished professional photographer
  • writing classes until I finish my e-book

There you have it. I am a knowledge hoarder and a craft junkie. I am holding myself accountable and devoting the little free time I have to doing versus obsessively learning. My guess is that the time I spend working on my writing and photography skills will teach me as much as the gazillion resources I have been electronically horading. At least I hope so.

passion rut

Are you a knowledge pack rat?