Top Five Signs That Your Toddler Might Be a Douche

I adore my son. Everyone knows it. However I have to be honest. Pweezy can at times be a total douche (I am pretty sure he inherited it from his father). Don't believe me?

Please read the following signs that my toddler might be a douche and let me know what you think.

1. He wears hipster douche type hats

"This? Oh ya its just my awesome new hat".
Sure he looks good but he gets the WORST attitude when he puts this hat on. I have no idea why. He puts the hat on, gives me the side eye, and then refuses to say his pleases and thank yous. Very douchey behavior indeed.

2. He does this any time he is anywhere near toilet paper.

"This is the last roll in the house? Oh you needed this?".

3. He drives a BMW

"And girl you better be wearing something nice when I pick you up".
There isn't too much to say. He is leaning up against his BMW, topless! with slicked back hair, and talking on an iPhone. Totally douchey : )

4. He gives you the ice grill from the second he is born. 

"I run shit". 

That is a picture of P taken seconds after he was born. See that look on his face? He is two seconds old and he is already letting you know who is in charge. I started to get scared not too long after this picture was taken.

5. The video is self explanatory.

Am I the only one with a douchey (gorgeous, sweet, and hilarious) toddler at home? 

Share your stories with me. It'll make me feel better : )